Today had ups and downs. I planned out my meals for today on Livestrong.com which was a good idea but then I screwed up my lunch. I was supposed to have a whole wheat, humus, lettuce, tomato, and onion sandwich with an apple, carrots, and cucumbers but instead I went for the salmon and rice option. At least I got 1/2 brown rice but that still kicked up my calories. Then, I had 2 Reese's Eggs. Damn Easter candy! I didn't even know about Reese's eggs until a couple weeks ago. Oh well, that added on some calories and I'm supposed to hang out with my friend tonight so who know what that will mean.
But...
What I'm most proud of today is that I went to my refrigerator got out the big tub of chocolate chip cookie dough and got out my last two Reese's eggs and I stood there, in front of my mirror, crying and telling myself not to eat them. And somehow I managed to slowly stuff them back into the fridge and the back of my closet. It may just be a small accomplishment to you guys but it is big to me. I most likely would have gone on to eat half the tub, and it's one of the giant Nestle tubs too! Oh well, a pat on the back for me.
My friend caught on to my skipping meals. I told her I wasn't walking down the hill to get food and she told me that starving is not the way to eat healthy. I wanted to yell at her, "Screw being healthy! I just want to be 100lbs thinner. No matter what it takes." But I didn't and instead I told her I eat, just not when she does and that I'm perfectly fine. Then of course she texts me today and asks me if I want to go to lunch. I'm way to smart to turn that down and risk looking like I'm lying and I really am starving and so I had my slip-up and ate the salmon and rice. At least it wasn't as bad as the quesadilla or the hamburger that I most likely would have gotten. I'm so glad I didn't do that!
Sorry for the long daily breakdown. I want to lose this weight and I need to be 227.2 or less (preferably 224) by Saturday morning. I'm trying to lose 5lbs/week officially starting in May but it's not like I'm gonna slack off until then. These next two weeks are like the start up to the hard-core restricting.
I can't wait to be thin!
Thinspo for the Day
Edit:
I screwed after I wrote this. A tuna sandwich, 1 1/2 snack bags of wheat thins, an oatmeal rasin cookie, and half a purity organic strawberry lemonade. Overall today I stayed below 2000, but not by much. I. Just hope my weight maintains or goes down tomorrow. Please not back up!
No comments:
Post a Comment